Kathy Griffin on Ann Coulter

(2008 Dec blog post)

! Preliminary ! A couple of more quotes-from-the-people, Coulter-quotes, and links, may be added later.

Home page > Blog menu > This page on Ann Coulter (cold, hard witch)

I have no respect at all for the political-illogic, hate-mongering, and fact-manufacturing of Ann Coulter. She seems to be just one more of many 'soul-sellers' populating the inescapable right-wing TV channels.

    (It has to be a joke that the pundits on those channels are constantly complaining about the "liberal media". A majority of the news channels on cable TV are actually "neo-con" propaganda outfits. A link to a local blog post on that topic is here. That post lists the typical spectrum of cable TV news channels, with their respective 'spokespersons'.)

It was quite entertaining to me when, around October 2007, I saw a recording of a Kathy Griffin comedy show on TV. Griffin made the following no-holds-barred observations on Coulter.

Kathy Griffin monolog :

    I was on GMA [Good Morning America] the same day as that b*tch Ann Coulter who said that the 9-11 widows were "harpies" and that their [dead] husbands probably wanted to divorce them anyway.

    Y'just know Ann Coulter is the wet-dream of all those creepy old conservative dudes. Like when Rumsfeld is beating off he's thinking... "Oh, suck it Ann!"

    Or Cheney.. "Yeah, tea-bag my sh*t Ann."

    When you hear something like what she said, you literally turn into Scoobie Do.

    "Those widows are Harpies." [Griffin imitating Coulter]

    Ruh!! [Griffin's head turns. She lifts her hands up like the ears of a dog perking up.]

    "They just wanted the money, and their husbands were gonna leave them anyway." [Griffin imitating Coulter again]


    As an American I was offended, but as a Comedian ... [Griffin winks]

    [Griffin to her assistant...] Jessica, send her a fruit basket!

    So later, Al Roker was interviewing me and I said "What's up with that nutbag Ann Coulter? Why's she still rockin' the black mini-cocktail dress at 7 in the morning? Was she banging someone last night and didn't have time to go home and change?"

    It's like it's 1980 and she's in a Robert Palmer video.

    [Griffin does the side to side dance] "...The lights are on... but you're not home..."

    So I went over to Matt Lauer and said, "You're not f**king her are ya?"

    And he goes "What?"

    "You're not f**king her are ya?"

    And he says "Not after today!"

End of monolog.

That Griffin monologue triggered a boatload of comments on blogs --- some of which are recorded below.

No doubt --- besides Rumsfeld and Cheney --- Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh also have wet dreams about Coulter.

If Bill O'Reilly were standing next to Coulter on a crowded subway car, you can bet that he would not be able to keep his hyperactive hands off of her body, even though it is an apparent product of bulemia and anorexia. (If she had a boob job --- like most of the other blondes on FixNews, she would turn those guys into slobbering fools. Wait, they already are.)

What a "cold hard bitch" [link to song of the same name goes here] that woman is. (She must have a small amygdala. The implications of a small amygdala will be discussed in another local blog post.)

Enough said about Coulter. Hopefully she will fade quickly from public memory.

Aw, heck. I can't resist. Not enough said. Following is a collection of Coulter digs.

Here are some selected quotes on Ann Coulter that I have collected from various blogs and web pages. (There are a lot of comedians posting comments on blog sites.)

  • "So, let's give her some credit. Let's hear it for the pompous, big-throated, bleach-blonde, lying sack of crap. Without her, we would never know for sure what the truth is. All we have to do is believe the opposite of what she says."

  • "I wonder if she ever gets home at the end of the day, and says, 'Damn, I'm tired of hearing my own voice!'"

  • "Do you think she has nightmares of having sexual relations with people like Al Gore and Ralph Nader and Michael Moore?"

  • Kathy Griffin on the Today Show, circa June 2006:
    "I saw that nut-bag on the show earlier. ... Doesn't she just make stuff up? Who fact checks?"

  • "Letterman had a little promo which explained --- Ann Coulter thinks Clinton is gay because he told her he was gay as a nice way to say no thank you to her bony ass. Then they throw up a graphic which reads 'Clinton: Only Gay When it Comes to Evil, Crazy Bitches.'"

  • "Ann's condescending ... logic demands a rebuttal.

    Quoting from her post:

      I can't say it any clearer, or plainer. It's Logic 101, folks. I took this class my first year at college. Gays are really horny and indiscriminating, and Bill Clinton is really horny and indiscriminating, therefore, Bill Clinton is Gay. A=C, B=C, therefore A=B.

    The psychological reasoning behind her argument is specious without delving into logical fallacies, but she has graciously provided us with a fine example of reasoning everyone who has taken Logic 101 should know: the fallacy of the divided middle. To provide another example of the same form:

      All cats are domesticated quadrupeds.

      My dog is a domesticated quadruped.

      Therefore, my dog is a cat.

    Now, if Ann had rearranged her premises a bit, she'd have a valid syllogism:

      Gays are really horny and promiscuous.

      Bill Clinton is Gay.

      Therefore, Bill Clinton is horny and promiscuous.

    Too bad she hasn't offered any meaningful evidence supporting that second premise.

    I imagine that Ann could construct some similar syllogisms proving that war is peace, slavery is freedom, and ignorance is strength."

  • "She reminds me of the kid in the class who will do anything to get attention."

  • "I think she's had a lobotomy. If not, why not?"

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Posted 2008 Dec 28.
Changed slightly, for better printing, 2009 Aug 25.
Changed file structure (underneath), 2013 Apr 16.
Fixed some links 2013 Apr 22.